Monday, February 23, 2009

walking everywhere

I have been walking. I had no time today, but I walked three and a half hours, and three of them alone, with my body and my eyes. I had time. I discovered time. Extra time in in between.
I walked in the afternoon to work, it took me an hour to get there, but for once the sun was shining. My head slowed down and I enjoyed the images around me. An old man sitting on a park bench with his walker in front of him, two ten year old boys kissing, a six year old washing the windows of a café and dancing at the same time.
At work, my knee started splitting and popping and feeling quite uncomfortable. I was a bit nervous, since I had injured it a week ago in a fall. But walking didn’t seem to be a problem.
I walked from the Pijp to near central station to meet some friends for a drink. There was a line of cars backed up on the singel gracht waiting. They were staring at me, they were waving. Men in cars. Was it me seeking contact? Or me noticing?
My eyes falling over the landscape in motion, seeing things I don’t usually see, noticing, the landscape a dream imagery.
It was three in the morning when I left the second bar. I was happy with the simple night, and two beers, and conversation. I walked out the bar and imagined my home, one and a half hours away. I walked a bit with W. who walks everywhere, and does not use a bike, then slightly sidetracked from my path took a long curvy way home. Images. Small things, courtyards.
I get stronger and more solid. I can feel myself. I am walking. I am so calm that I am able to go outside of myself, able to take in the world around me, and it conforms to my gaze. I am looking. I am going to work. I drink with people in the bar. I recognize the streets. I don’t recognize the streets. I have attraction. Now the birds sing. My feet hurt. It is 5:30 in the morning. I know how I will feel in the morning, and know a will remember with too much force, the brief event, which has nothing to do with the project, because tomorrow I will discontinue for a moment, and my mind and body will continue to crave, the stimulus I have been giving them.

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